My Best Friend Got Hurt

MAN!!!

I think I'm losing it big time.

My world has revolved in and out of the world that created the words 'corruption', 'sadism', 'masochism', 'hedonism', 'euthanasia'. Yeah. My world that had words that can inflict different types of emotions still imparting a fervent feverish feeling that seems to stay there 'till you see some light.


My world. The sinful world that God strives to help. That God so ever loves. That God never gave up on but gave up on itself, it had. An elated world that revolves on unfounded ideas that also implodes to the fact that they are unfounded, disbelieved, unwanted or no one can drive them.

My friends. I think their my friends. I think too much. That's why I don't have much of them. Sports can land you on the top of the social ladder or the thing I call, The Social Foot Stain. Being mean to other people will rank you high on Priority Lane. They fear you as they are only mortals unseeing of any factual resignation of the legal patent to their rights. And your rights.

Cool is an undefined word in the vocabulary being used to designate the calls of howler monkeys lose in schools everywhere you turn. But being smart and really using it to impart so much of a hair's breadth of what you know, they start maltreating you and you lose hope of ever trying to contact losing humanity in the "people" around you.

Sleepless in Manila

I have watched City of Angels with Meg Ryan in it. Now, I watched Sleepless in Seattle with Meg Ryan in it. Why is Meg everywhere? Oh well... The films are pretty good. In the City of Angels, I cried because I "accidentally" thought of my grandfather's death. That film rocked. Anyway, Sleepless in Seattle was mild compared to the "crying session" LA gave me. But--Samuel Baldwin lost his wife, and his kid found a radio and a telephone and put two and two together. A woman who lived across the country heard the phone call over the radio because of a radio programme, "Dr. Martha Fieldstone Hour". I dunno what it was called. Just that the Ph.D. in the show had that name. Anyway, there was this movie in it, a film named "An Affair to Remember". "That's a chicks' movie." Yes, it is. And, I extremely don't get it. Just by looking at it, I don't get it. Even the "guys' movie". I just don't get it. Well... Beside all of that ranting, Sleepless in Seattle is a nice movie to watch--if you've just experienced City of Angels (CoA), this is a soother. :D

Especially, near the midnight hour. Really sleepless in manila.

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Insanely me ;)

The Crying Sessions

My grandmother and I started to watch a movie together. It was the "City of Angels". I watched it for the most part of the movie, as my Gran slept it off. But, in the end, we cried together. I kind of feel guilty of making her cry like that. She hasn't cried like that since my grandfather died. They were inseparable. That movie wasn't really cry-much-worthy but something about its ending, and how I knew Maggie (Meg Ryan) would die in the end, made me cry. And, I don't cry that easily. Not even for my stupid grades (coming from someone who's goal is high grades). I cry about things involving my childhood. My mother, mostly. Talk about her in a disrespectful fashion and you get some serious law issues. I grew up with only a mom by by side. She's a single parent and she's the only one I've got, besides by only family side--my grandparent(s), my cousins, my aunts and uncles. My mom means the world to me. Period. The same maybe said about my Gran. She's the one who taught me how to read and appreciate books like they are part of my flesh, my spirit, my soul. These wonderful people were the ones I imagined while staring into the TV screen. I saw them all in that one shadowed moment of Maggie's uneventful accident. I thought about them and how fragile life truly is. Seth (Nicolas Cage) had unconditional love for Maggie. Now, that's something you don't see or hear or bother very often. They say that there's no such thing as unconditional love--I say they're wrong. How do you think we ended alive in the first place? God has unconditional love for us. Children have it too. But, I think it fades with the innocence of purity and corrodes with the tarnished soul, bashed by the world's infidelity. Wow. Long excruciatingly floral sentence. *chuckles a little*

I just remembered my grandfather. That's all. And it hurts. That's all.

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Insanely me ;)

The Day When I was Born

149,639 People

That is one serious deal. With one life, so many died. Go figure.

I always thought that when I was born the world was gray and it was in a thunderstorm--I didn't think that it would be this bad. I can't even begin to describe how horrible I feel in the time of writing this; the young ones born into our world today would grow and find that the day when they were born, there were more lives taken than their fathers' and/or mothers'. The melancholy I feel will never end, for this world is full of compassion and doubt and fear--the scrounging for innocence will never cease. The innocence of our world has long been tried to undermine, but we know there are people that are still pure. They balance the sins of this world. My lifetime is short--brief. Knowledge is an endless mass and never-ending pit. How large of a challenge!

But, hearken! There maybe deaths, but not all of them are meaningless. None of them are. The world finds its own justice; there are peaceful and closed deaths--they are released from the examination room and are left to fade into His arms; there are violent and untimely deaths--some are made by man's intent and others by man's mistake.

It's not how you died--but it's how you lived and died fighting for life, living for something that's real. Believing that someone is there. Having God within you, your life, your legacy.


Insanely me ;)